Developing Your Cooperation Capacity

You have clicked on the link for the Cooperation Capacity, but you aren’t enrolled for it yet.

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Clicking an enrollment link below indicates that you agree to the Terms of Service.

Click Enrollment Video if you want to watch a video that explains your enrollment options.

Click Cooperation Capacity Enrollment Wizard if you want to be guided through a step-by-step enrollment process.
Otherwise make a choice below.

Choices in Developing Your Cooperation Capacity

(Clicking on shaded text opens a pop-up with an explanation of the text.)

You have a choice of working on developing your Cooperation Capacity... 
1. On its own or 
2. Along with a pattern that tends to block it.

Many people who need to work on developing a capacity have a problematic pattern (or more than one) that gets in the way of that capacity.

For example 

XFor example, If you need to develop Self-Esteem, this could be because your Inner Critic Pattern is causing low Self-Esteem. Or if you need to develop Assertiveness, this could be because your People-Pleasing Pattern is blocking your Assertiveness. You could even have more than more pattern that interferes with a healthy capacity. For example, in addition to Assertiveness being blocked by the People-Pleasing Pattern, it could also be blocked by the Underminer, Victim, Conflict-Avoiding, or Passive-Aggressive Patterns.

Below you can choose whether you want to first work on transforming one (or more) of your patterns to support the development of your Cooperation Capacity. By first clearing out those patterns that interfere with the flourishing of your Cooperation Capacity, you are more likely to be able to develop your Cooperation Capacity and have it when you want it in your life. 

A. Capacity Only (Shift Level)

With this option, you decide not to work on clearing out any patterns and just go directly to work on developing your Cooperation Capacity. You may have already worked through the patterns that were blocking your Cooperation Capacity, or you may believe that you can develop this capacity without dealing with any patterns first.

Click here to enroll for the Cooperation Capacity at the Shift Level for $8.

B. Capacity and Main Pattern that Blocks It (Change or Transformation Level)

Each pattern in STJ is paired with one capacity that will be the most help in changing that pattern. For example, the Conflict-Avoiding Pattern is paired with the Challenge Capacity, which means that if you have the Conflict-Avoiding Pattern, the Challenge Capacity is the best capacity to help in transforming this pattern. When a pattern and capacity are paired, it also means that the pattern tends to blocks the capacity it is paired with. For example, if you want to develop Challenge, the pattern that is most likely to be in your way is the Conflict-Avoiding Pattern.

With this option, You first transform the Controlling or Rebel Pattern, since these are the main two patterns that block the Cooperation Capacity (each of them is paired with Cooperation in STJ), and then develop the Cooperation Capacity and create a real-time practice to activate it in your life.

Since you aren't enrolled for the Cooperation Capacity at this level, you have these options for enrolling:

1. Click here to enroll for the Cooperation Capacity at the Change Level for $14.50, which includes the Controlling Pattern and the Rebel Pattern.

2. Click here to enroll for a $30 monthly subscription to all patterns and capacities at the Change Level.

3. Click here to enroll for a $40 monthly subscription to all patterns, capacities, and wounds at the Transformation Level.

Upgrade from Shift to Change Level. If you have already enrolled for the Cooperation Capacity at the Shift Level and you want to upgrade to the Change Level, please log in first. Then you will see what to do.

C. Capacity and Other Patterns that Block It (Change or Transformation Level)

With this option, you first transform one (or more) of the other patterns that can block the Cooperation Capacity, and then explore the Cooperation Capacity and create a real-time practice to activate it in your life.

Below is a list of the patterns that can block your Cooperation Capacity. If you think you might want to work on one of them, click on the link. This will take you to a page with a fuller description of the pattern (let's call it Pattern P). You will have the option of working on Pattern P right now or putting it on a To-Explore list for the future.

How This Works

Note: When you finish working on Pattern P, the Conclusion page has a link for continuing, which goes to a list of capacities. Click on the Cooperation Capacity to work on it or another blocking pattern.

Before you start working on one of these patterns, click  This will put the Cooperation Capacity on the Capacities To-Explore list, which you can access from your Dashboard. It will remind you to come back and explore your Cooperation Capacity even if you don't remember to do it as soon as you finish the pattern you chose.

Patterns that can block the Cooperation Capacity

* Angry Pattern When I get angry, I refuse to cooperate with people.

* Judgmental Pattern When I get judgmental toward people, I don't want to work together with them.

* Defensive Pattern When I get defensive with people, it is hard to collaborate with them.

* Intimacy-Avoiding Pattern When I am distant from my partner, I tend to not cooperate with him or her.

* Procrastination Pattern Sometimes I procrastinate as a way of not cooperating with someone.

* Passive-Aggressive Pattern When I act in a Passive-Aggressive manner, I frustrate people rather than cooperating with them.

More Information: Click here to learn more about the enrollment levels and options.


Enrollment Choices
Learn about enrollment levels and options.


"Shift" Enrollment Level for a Capacity

  • Quick simple behavior shift
  • Clear goal
For people who are…
  • Busy, after quick results
  • Just starting to work on a capacity
  • Coaching clients 
Click here for more information. 

"Change" Enrollment Level

  • Psychological insight
  • Behavior change
  • Experiential (IFS) therapy
For people who want to…
  • Engage in experiential therapy for more complete behavior change
  • Augment their coaching or psychotherapy with self-therapy
  • Learn how to use IFS
Click here for more information. 

"Transformation" Enrollment Level

  • Psychological insight
  • Behavior change
  • Experiential depth (IFS) therapy
  • Personality transformation
For people who want to…
  • Dedicate themselves to personal growth work
  • Engage in depth therapy for full transformation
  • Explore and heal their childhood wounds
  • Augment their psychotherapy with self-therapy
Click here for more information. 

Learning about STJ

Click Intro to STJ for the basics of STJ.
(also on the home page and the pages introducing patterns, capacities, wounds.)

Click How STJ Works to learn more about how it operates.
XA pattern is a way of acting, relating, thinking, or feeling that is a problem for you or others. It may keep you from getting you what you want in life. It may close you off to your own experience or your connection with others. It may cause you or others unnecessary pain. A pattern tends to be too rigid, extreme, dysfunctional, or inappropriate for whatever situation you are in.

Click here for a list of all the patterns in STJ. 

If you know IFS, click here for a discussion of how patterns relate to IFS.

XA capacity is a healthy way of being. It is a goal for personal growth. It is a way of functioning (and experiencing) that involves feeling good, getting what you want in life, and relating well to other people. Some capacities are interpersonal, such as Intimacy and Assertiveness. Some are personal, such as Ease and Self-Esteem.

Click here for a list of all the capacities in STJ.

XA wound is an underlying psychological place of pain or negative belief about yourself or the world. 

A wound is caused by an incident or series of incidents or a relationship in childhood (or occasionally in adulthood) in which you were harmed, frightened, or rejected in some way, or in which you didn't get important needs met. The result is unresolved pain or trauma. For example, the Domination Wound leads you to expect to be dominated or to be afraid of being dominated. It is caused by being controlled too much as a child.

If you know IFS, a wound is a type of burden carried by an exile. For example, if you have the Abandonment Wound, it means that you have an exile who was abandoned.

You must have an access code in order to work on wounds. Click here for more information about this.

XIf you subscribe to all of STJ at the Change or Transformation Level, your credit card will be automatically charged each month until you notify us that you want to unsubscribe.

XIf you choose to work Pattern P now, this will include developing the capacity that is paired with it (let's call this Capacity C). Even though Capacity C is different from the Cooperation Capacity, developing Capacity C will support you in developing your Cooperation Capacity.

For example, suppose you want to develop Assertiveness and you decide that you first need to work through your Underminer Pattern. Since the Underminer Pattern is paired with the Courage Capacity, you will be developing the Courage Capacity as part of working through your Underminer Pattern. But this is a good thing, because the Courage Capacity will support you in developing Assertiveness when you get to it.